A lot of men think that Muslim men are fortunate to be allowed to have up to four wives, all at the same time. But even in Islam, Muslim men are obliged to understand the condition why plural marriage is allowed, an act that is neither required nor encouraged, but simply permitted and not outlawed.
In fact, Muslim men cannot just marry any woman of his choice without the blessing of his first wife. This debunks the myth that Muslim men have license to marry four wives whenever they please because Islam condones it. Also, the man must be financially and physically capable of providing the needs of his wives equally. The decision is up to the guy anyway.
There are some points why polygamy is allowed in Islam. In their belief, God already knows that women will outnumber men. By this, all women may have the privilege to get married and have a family in a legal way. Some women are unable to give birth due to illness or age; in this case, their husbands can have another wife.
In Islamic marriage, if a man is interested in a woman, he should properly propose and ask the parents or guardian for approval. This also shows a decent and sincere heart from the side of the guy. If the parents approve, and the lady also approve, then they will be engaged. By then, they are allowed to see and talk to each other to get to know more about them. But this does NOT mean they are allowed to be alone in a room and do whatever a married couple can do. During the engagement stage, if both or one party decides to break the engagement due to incompatibility, they can still do so. If not, then they will eventually have to decide when the wedding will take place.
The concept of polygany (commonly known as polygamy) associated with Islam, as if it were introduced as the norm of Islamic teachings. Understanding better the concept of polygamy is tremendously liberating. To support the issue, there is a verse where the Almighty says in the Qur’an (Surah An-Nisah, Verse 3) “marry women of your choice, two or three, or four but if you fear that you will not be able to deal justly with them, then only one, or what your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice.”
Furthermore, rationalized that in the Qur’an (4:3), polygyny was restricted in terms of the number of wives and the requirement of justice between them after the Battle of Uhud, where dozens of Muslims died leaving behind widows and orphans. Some interpreted the verse as a moral, practical, and humane solution to the problems of the increasing number of vulnerable widows and orphans after battles. Even their prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was able to marry among the widows and orphans for practical religious reasons.
But the rationale behind the Prophet’s cause in marrying many wives in those years became the knock against of not a few Islam-bashing scenarios floated in different media platforms. What is unknown to many is that the Muhammad at the age of 25, married a famous highly respected lady of Mecca Khadija bint Khuwaylid , 15 years his senior. They remained in their monogamous marriage for 25 years until she passed away. Taking both the Qur’anic verse and the life of the Muhammad in consideration, every Muslim man should find greater meaning in the value of monogamy in marriage.
Marriage as per se, is the union of two persons; the time they have become one and becoming married more than once at the same time loses the meaning of its term.
Disclaimer: Photos were downloaded from Google.